I think its time to make some major changes in my life. My outlook . . . my organization . . my drive . . my goals. I haven't really been living my life.
It's not like I've been a hermit. But in regards to a social life? Thats pretty close to the truth.
It's not like I don't do anything. Far from it. I work a full time day job . . . I'm a professional musician in the evenings. I do a lot. But that just about sums me up. I go. . . I do (work, play etc), I go home.
Wash, rinse, repeat.
I've been floating through really. Not really pushing myself. . . not really expecting a lot. My house is a mess . . and I really think thats a reflection of my life at the moment. (ok . . . so yes. . . I'm moving. But thats not an excuse. My life is cluttered . . . as is my apartment. moving or not).
What's happened to ~me~? The fun me. The me that went dancing with my friends . . . the me that got out and played. The me that was motivated. The me that pushed myself until I got where I wanted to be?
I think she's hiding.
I need to find her. I think we played a game of hide and seek . . and she's been hiding for a while, and I've yet to find her. She's getting restless. Can't blame her really . . she's been hiding for quite some time! 
So life has a new plan. New apartment, new car . . . new outlook. New motivations, new energy (even if it kills me! *grin*). A NEW old me.
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