I got to pick my mom up at the airport Monday night.  This was the first time I had seen her since the beginning of Feburary.  ( !! )

Mom left for England back in Feb to go help my Grandmother prepare for a hip replacement.   She was going to go over there for a month or two . . help her through the surgery and recovery . . and then come back home. 

Before the surgery could happen, they found the beginnings of cancer in my Grandmothers bladder.   (they found it through a re-occurring bladder infection.)   Suddenly a month or two turned into . . 'well . . maybe three or four months'.  Then the cancer grew and spread.  That stuff acts so quickly sometimes.  My mother called me the second week of July. . . . and told me to plan my trip out there a little sooner than I thought . . . maybe sometime in August . . . because the doctors said there was nothing they could do for her.

I planned my trip for the first week of August . . . and started saving $$ to be able to pay for the plane ticket to the UK.

Sunday morning . . July 16th . .  my Grandmother . . . my darling, sweet, amazingly wonderful Grandmother passed away.  I never got the chance to see her for the last time . . . I never got the chance to get the ticket to go to her funeral. 

I feel guilty.  INCREDIBLY guilty.  I'm family.  I loved that woman SO much (I still love her so much) . . it still kills me to think about it.  It just happened so fast . . . I didn't have the money . . my job would have fired me . . . excuses excuses excuses.    I should have gone.  *sigh*  I can't get that horribly guilty feeling out of my heart right now . . .    . . .    . . . I should have gone. . .

Aaahhh what a weekend. 

It was just what I needed.    I left the state . . . went west about 3.5/4 hours . . . spent some time with someone I care about very much . . . and generally had a lovely, relaxing weekend. 

PA is beautiful this time of year.  Its beautiful any time of year, but especially now.  The colors, the mountains (little mountains . . but mountains nonetheless!)  I went to the Fall Foliage Festival with R. . . we just wandered around . . looked at the arts and crafts . . . looked at all the lovely old homes in downtown Bedford (one of them was refurbed . . . and had this LOVELY gas lamp out front.  it looked fantastic!)

Its so darned pretty out there.  If I didn't have such a good job and musical network here, I'd probably end up out that way . . somewhere in a pretty little town with pretty little houses, lots of land and great views.  I'm definitely an aesthetic person . . I like to take in my surroundings and enjoy them every day (hence the enjoyment I get out of my drive to work.)

It's also nice that someone out that way likes me a little bit.  (just a little)    R and I met on August 25th.  (I'm usually not good with dates. . . but this meeting also came as a precursor to my apartment move . . so for the moment, I remember the date)  He came all the way out from PA to help me pack up all my crap and haul it a few miles north. 
                                                                                                                    and he didn't even get a lousy t-shirt.

But he stuck with it . . hung out with me for the weekend . . . and then ended up coming out the following weekend as well. 

the rest . . . well . . is still in the making I suppose.  This was my first trip out there . . . it was a little nerve wracking . . (I got to meet the 'friends' . . or . . at least some of them) . . . but it was nice too.  Really nice.  I enjoyed it immensly out there.  I enjoyed him immensly too. 

hehehe

I also took my camera out there . . . BUT . . the camera never left the car.  dangit.  I could have taken all sorts of nice pics.  . .   . .   . . oh well.  I'll take pics the next time I'm out there. 

Water is the element that predominates in your life. Water rules the signs Cancer, Scorpio, and Pisces.

Water  --------------  70%
Earth ------------ 65%
Fire ------------ 60%
Air ---------- 55%
Spirit ------- 40%

Funny how that works.  My name is Welsh for "Goddess of the Sea"

and I kinda like water.

just a little. 

 (read . . I'd live on it if I could!) 

which of the 5 elements are you?

OK, so you all need to visit this site:

'Jenny'

she just started writing recnetly (semi-recently anyways) . . . and she deserves a read. 

have fun!

I went to see the tree yesterday (bright firey tree pictured in post below).  The leaves were red and green this year . .. not that intense golden fire color that it was a few years ago, when I took that picture. 

I wasn't aware that trees did that . . . I always thought they turned only one color.  I guess it depends on the climate that year.  This year it has been rainy, and has gotten chilly pretty early.  The year I took that picture, it was still warm, but chilly at night, and dry. 

amazing what a little climate change will do. 

I still don't have internet access . . . so instead of showing new photos . . I'm recycling some old photos.  But thats ok . . I still like them.   

This is one of my favorite times of the year.  Its a toss-up between fall and summer.  I like them both for separate reasons.  I love summer because I adore warm weather . . sunshine . . taking walks on the water, or out in the park . . . just being on the water period.  ( or in it for that matter!! ).  Long days and gorgeous flowers and all that good stuff. 

But I love fall because of the atmosphere and the color.  Its so CRISP outside . . . and the air just smells amazing and fresh.  It fills you with energy and beckons you from the indoors out.  You walk outside, and the clarity of the days are amazing . .. everything looks brighter . . smells better . . .and the color!  The trees turn guilt and gold and dazzle you. 

My drive to and from work is quite possibly the best part of my day.  I come in on the Cleveland Shoreway. . . I pass through Edgewater Park, and get on the shoreway for my quick 5 minute jaunt.  But its the most beautiful part of my day!  It runs (as the name may suggest), along the shore of Lake Erie.  And the views I get of not only the lake, but the park and the city and just breathtaking.  I'll have to bring my camera along on my next excursion out there . . and get some pics (to be uploated at a later time. heh) . . so I can share them.  Its lovely.  really and truely lovely.  Infact I'll probably go out there this weekend to catch some color.  Its very refreshing to see that every day though.  My morning and evening stress relief. 

so anyways . .  busy as can be.  Hopefully I'll be more fun again when I get internet access at home . . and i have more than 20 minutes to bang out an entry.   

oh yeah . . and changed my site back.  I like this theme muuch better.    much better. 

toodles!!!!!

I still have no internet access.    I also have no TV.      I may just leave it that way.  It's amazing what one can accomplish when there's nothing around to lure you into sitting on your butt.   Not that I don't sit on my butt anyways. 

but thats beside the point.  (besides the point?)  whatever.  In english class, I am not.  Yoda.

anyways. 

the apartment is coming together slowly.  I'm a busy girl with too much to do . . and too much laundry.  And I hate laundry.  i don't mind doing it.  I abhor putting it away.  Its now residing on my bed, in gargantuan piles of yummy scented fabric.  (I found a new detergent, that I adore.  It matches my fabric softner. it smells delightful!)  So now of course everything is heaped on my bed . . and wrinkling faster than I can even hope to hang/fold any of it. 

*sigh*  at least it smells good. 

I'll have to continue this later . . . . its time to go to rehearsal.   toodles!

Ok, so I'm really starting to hate this color theme. 

I think I shall be changing it.  (eventually)

unfortunately, at the moment, I have no internet access at home . . . so I can only visit here at work . . and thats only for an hour at lunch.  meh.  not enough time to set up a whole new color scheme.  Sooo . . I'll just have to wait.  or come in early one day. 

I don't know if I can come in early for Xanga . . .  . .    . . .   . . I need my beauty sleep.

  We're getting quite a show today. 

The Blue Angels are buzzing around above Cleveland . .  I got quite a show at lunch! 

Nothing brings people outside like the sound of military jet fighters flying too damn close to your windows. 

I miss working in the skyscraper during these weekends . . . because the Angels would buzz us . . and they'd be on the same level as us . . they'd wave . . we'd wave back.  All very cool.  (though, that stopped for a while after 9/11 . . but from what I hear . . they are slowly starting to do it again.  people get a big ole kick out of it). 

Such excitement!

Lots of things are changing for me today. (kindof). 

a:  I'm turning in the keys to my old apartment.  Bye bye cookiecutter central air brand new everything nasty carpet bedroom flooding apartment.  I won't miss you much. 

b:  I'm telling Sprint PCS to go F themselves.  I'm gonna get myself a swanky new phone from T-Mobile, and then call Sprint and tell 'em to shove it. (ever so politely of course)

heres the new phone I shall purchase:

  It's an MP3 player.  Bluetooth stuff.  Great T-Mobile service.  

Ok . . back to work for now.  Everyone enjoy the AMAZING weather outside . . since i can't at the moment. 

This is a double post.  Same subject . . two different 'offenders'. 

First . . . look at the date of the last post. 

August 21st.                  What's today? 

August 30th.                                                It took till today, about 1 hour ago, to turn my gas on. 

do you know what it's like taking a shower for a week with no hot water?

I feel. . . grimey.  I'll tell ya what tho . . it sure wakes you up in the morning.

WHY on gods green earth does it take ten days for a gas company to turn the gas on?  All the *bleeep*er had to do was flip a frickin switch.                             Sad thing is . . . i know exactly why.  The left hand doesn't know what the right hand is doing.  No communicado! 

I called on Monday.  They said ok, we'll be there on Thurs.  No one showed on Thursday, so I called.  "We don't have a ticket for you'.         OK.  put a damn ticket in for me then.  "ok, we'll be there this weekend".  Called this past weekend to make sure they'd be there.  "We can't be there until Wed. . . it'll be between 12 and 4."      Who has to work?  Obviously not me.  *bangs head against wall*

*THANKFULLY* the gas guy was there, right at 12:00 when I got there.   (went home for lunch.  LOVE being able to go home for lunch!)  He flipped the damn switch . . and was nice enough to come upstairs and light the pilot light on my stove.  Then he left.  It took him all of 5 minutes. 

bastards

so why is this a dual story?

WELL.

I've been unable to access one of the main systems here that I need to do my job.  That means that I have had work piling up and piling up since . . oh. . . Thursday of the week before last.

yes. . . before last.

And the douchebags over at (some unnamed company)'s IT department couldn't get their heads out of their asses long enough to figure out how to help me.

until today.

I guess today is the day that things get fixed for me.   better late than never I suppose.

Oh well.  No more complaining for me.  I now have a TON of work to do, since our systems are back online.  joy.